TV: Heroes Season Finale

Spoilers Follow.

As is par for the course for Heroes, the latest, and final, episode of the season manages to surprise almost everyone watching, although this time not in a good way. For anyone that isn't watching Heroes, it's a show about 'ordinary people with extraordinary powers' that manages to include every single superhero power ever created and create Dallas quality cliffhangers every week. This is the type of series that season finale writers dream of their whole life. This is the series that makes children want to grow up and write season finales. Superpowers give you the ability to make anything happen and the comic book style that the series pays homage to makes even the most ridiculous plot elements completely acceptable. In short, this season finale was a pitch right over the plate. Underhand. From an 8 year old. With a basketball.

And someone missed.

The moment that everyone was waiting for from this indulgently epic series, the battle between Jedi-like characters Peter and Sylar, never materializes. To put so much effort into creating subtle and no-so-subtle superhero references throughout the series and skip the traditional ten page final battle is disappointing to say the least. We're teased by the possibility of a truly climactic struggle between good and evil when Peter tells Nikki/Jessica to leave Sylar to him...and then...nothing great really happens.

The comic book cock tease continues: Nathan appears. Does this herald the creation of a new villain, or perhaps the revealing of Sylar's spectacular counter-plot? No. No tangled webs are woven. Nathan and Peter make a beautiful and noble sacrifice sprinkled with brotherly love. Families are restored. More noble sacrifices. Hugging. Viewers wonder if this was only intended to run for a single season. The 'cliffhanger' that finally materializes is unsatisfying and can be reversed with two lines of dialogue (maybe it still is like Dallas).

For everyone's benefit, here are some traditional and satisfying comic-book style endings.
1. Nathan grabs Claire and flies away. Claire shoots. Blackout.
2. Sylar finds an unconscious Candice (the illusion girl) and absorbs her power. Sylar's 'death' is simply an illusion he creates to force Peter to explode.
3. A new power is introduced, preferably from the Patrelli matriarch.
4. Future Hiro stops Present Hiro from killing Sylar, telling him that the future becomes much worse if he does.
5. Sylar and Peter both explode when they touch; it turns out that only their combined powers could destroy the city. Discussion of destiny ensues.
6. An epic battle. Between anyone.

Make some alternate endings for the DVD release, just make sure to credit me as an executive producer.